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At the Feet of The Mother


“Is it really possible to bring Narbheram back to a right attitude in his sadhana — your Force using me as an instrument?”

Are not the above suggestions stupid? You have often warned me that such ideas are formulated by the outer being and that they are usually inspired by a subtle delusion of the human ego. Why then do they still insist after my denials?

Of course such suggestions are meant to wake the ego. I suppose they persist because they still have a hope of waking the ego. Even when one is quite free all kinds of suggestions can come. One either takes no notice of them or else gives a glance to see whether there is any fragment of ego still lurking somewhere.

Those who could really help others, in the matter of sadhana, will not do it until they become a conscious channel for the Mother to work through them. Otherwise it is rather our vital ego that is prominent.

Quite right. One can be a channel for the Mother’s help but the idea of oneself helping others comes in the way and so long as it is there one cannot be a truly effective channel.

The idea of helping others is a delusion of the ego. It is only when the Mother commissions and gives the force that one can help and even then only within limits.

Is it good for the mind and vital to perceive the movements of others?

Not unless there is a quiet and dispassionate perception, correct in its seeings.

Before one gets this perception, one may let the attempt go on and afterwards try to correct the result and finally ask you to give the right view.

No. That is no use, it merely encourages the passing of mental judgements usually of a personal kind.

If a sadhak commits a mistake in his sadhana why do others bother about it? They are not here to enlighten him.

It is certainly superfluous to intervene in another person’s sadhana — but you should receive all remarks and criticisms about yourself with a quiet mind and without any reaction against the critic.

What is this prevalent talk about the ‘advanced sadhaks’? Is it not nonsense, since we are all quite incapable of knowing who is more or less advanced in yoga?

Yes. The talk about advanced sadhaks is a thing I have always discouraged — but people go on because that appeals to the vital ego.

But who are these advanced sadhaks? How is an advanced sadhak known from an unadvanced one?

You said, “If you can keep the station above so much the better, but as almost everybody is down in the physical, it is a little difficult perhaps.” A sadhak brings me the news that some sadhaks like Pavitra and Anilbaran live constantly on the intuitive plane.

I am not aware that they or anybody lives constantly on the intuitive plane. All are at grips with the difficulties of the physical consciousness at present — though of course to one like Anilbaran the suggestion of revolt cannot come — at least it has never done so up to now.

It is a bit of a surprise to learn that there is only one sadhak to whom a suggestion of revolt cannot come. I thought there were some more, like Khirod, Dyuman, Pavitra.

Khirod was not mentioned so I did not speak of him. As for the others they may get suggestions but do not yield to them.

You referred to M. as having strong desires. Is it not rather unusual to have them especially after coming here?

No, most people have strong desires of one kind or another.

Even in the absence of justifiable reasons why do people become angry?

People do not get angry for reasons, but because of their ego.

I am told that the exterior life of V. is very ordinary. Is this true?

The exterior life of many here is very ordinary.

What about the dejects of others? Should we watch and judge them or simply close our eyes to them?

One has to see, but not judge (i.e. not condemn, simply observe). Each is driven by his nature, so long as he does not consent to change masters and be driven by the Divine.

May I have your permission to resume my classes with P?

P’s contact is not always very helpful. If it is only for learning language etc. it may be done, provided you do not allow anything from him to impress you.

Is it possible that his personality may influence me without my knowing it?

An influence like that can always act if one is not on one’s guard.

An impulse of jealousy came into my consciousness, the jealousy of another sadhak’s progress. But my vital itself rejected it, realising that if he advances faster my own perfection will be accelerated, for one sadhak’s progress automatically helps others.

Exactly so. A sadhak ought always to rejoice in the progress of another, as if it were his own.

I wonder how Z could get such high experiences and realisations with a nature so full of insincerity and ego-centredness.

One can realise certain things in the inner being (especially the inner mind) without transformation of the outer nature. Z’s inner mind once it opened proved to be extremely receptive — but his inner vital and physical only opened for a while then closed, the outer man prevailed and the outer man in Z is of a very disagreeable kind.

In that case was there no attaining of higher perfection, as he was always boasting of doing?

No. There was no attaining of higher perfection after he definitely yielded to his lower nature. There was only a repetition of former things whenever he happened to be able to withdraw from his lower nature.

I suppose you would admit that he advanced so quickly because his vital and ego were helping his sadhana, as he wanted to be a great yogi, a superman. With us, the vital and the ego are the two greatest stumbling-blocks all along the path.

I admit nothing of the kind. He went quickly because the inner mental being had a great receptivity and the vital a great ardour. But the ego was a stumbling-block from the first and the ambition a great hindrance.

He wanted to indulge his lower nature in many ways and disliked the Ashram discipline.

Before he actually left the Ashram did he have many ups and downs like most of us?

During the last year he was having ups and downs but finally his ego and lower nature got the upper hand.

You said, “Z was sincere and open to the Mother for about a year, making strong attempts to keep down the evil in his lower nature. Afterwards he deteriorated.” I am at a loss to understand how such a fall could come about when he was so open to the Mother. Had he then not accepted her as the Divine?

On the contrary he began more and more to make a distinction between the Mother and the Divine and to say he had no need of help or any outer mediary; he claimed to be identified with the Divine, not with the Mother. That is his present attitude.

It is said that the disappearance of the ego is so necessary for the psychic manifestation. I wonder then how Z could keep his psychic being so much in front during his first year’s stay here, though he had plenty of ego which he never thought of giving up.

Z’s realisation was not psychic, it was a realisation of calm and peace and of regions above his head. He developed a certain amount of love for the Mother in one part of his being — the other was always menacing it and whenever it rose up reviling and mocking at her and at the whole affair. In the first year, he kept this part down, so was able to receive from her many experiences.

Z has claimed to have seen, experienced and even realised so many deep and high things. All that appears to be doubtful, for a realised thing becomes a fact of life that will bring a permanent change in at least some part of the human nature, which we never noticed in him.

He had genuine experiences received directly from the Mother; but they were always in the higher mind and affected his mind and vital mainly by influence and reflection. At one moment there was a chance of establishing them up to the heart level, but his insincerity (unwillingness to change) prevented them from enduring. Naturally, he made much more of them in his poetry than what they really were.

What is exactly meant by “genuine experiences received directly from the Mother?” Could a sadhak here receive experiences indirectly or independently of the Mother?

Directly means in meditation with her, not only in his separate meditation. About the genuineness of these directly received experiences there can be no doubt, for what the Mother gave was genuine and could not be his own mental creation or poetic pretence.

When I spoke about Z’s experiences I did not actually mean that all of them were not genuine. Many of them were genuine but he had also some which were not true but rather imaginary and inspired by the ego! He often wrote about his experiences and visions of the Supermind, he smelt its descent! He was even sure that he would be among the first batch of the Supermen!

Others beside Z have assumed that they had the Supermind because something opened in them which was “super” to the ordinary human mind. It is a common mistake … I see no reason to doubt that Z saw things in vision (hundreds of people do) or had experiences.

By the way, have I the same insincerity, unwillingness to change, as Z?

There is certainly a great unwillingness in the vital to change and no sufficient will of the inner being to compel it to do so. Z’s, however, was a conscious insincerity, a will to cling to the lower parts of his nature and give them satisfaction whenever he felt like doing so.

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